Coffee and Crying

If you know me you may know I have a slight coffee addiction and you may also know that I am an emotional person. I am not a human that can hide their emotions, I show it on my face and with my voice tone. Today I woke up and it was raining and it was cold, I hate the rain and the cold. I was in a crappy mood already, I then noticed Renly my dog was missing from the bed, panic set in as I searched to finally find him asleep on the sofa.

Calming down and making a cup of coffee I had an attack come on. My heart is racing and my chest tightening I breathe in and out trying to stop it before it gets worse. The coffee alarm went off I got my cup and sat down on the sofa wrapping it in a blanket. The tears came and I could not stop my emotions, I sat there drank coffee, and cried. (No for anyone worried the tears did not get in my coffee)

Then I asked why am I crying, it wasn’t out of sadness it was madness mostly. I am mad that I am stuck in a spot at work where I am bored, I have grown out of the position I hold but there isn’t a promotion available. I am mad that good people get hurt when they are just trying their best to uplift others. I am mad it’s cold and raining outside, hell I am mad that I am mad.

The whole purpose of this pity party (that has no cake to enjoy) is there are people in this world that may smile but they are not okay. The positive, cheerful person might cry over their morning coffee and you not know it. I want everyone to make sure they know they are loved because some days it’s just plain hard to find it! So if you need to grab your coffee, cover up with a blanket and cry, because somedays we need to. Just remember when you finish your coffee and wash the mud out, those worries go down the drain with water

– Michael