Let Them Go.

“I am a loyal person, I’m just not people chaser. Once I get a vibe of being unwanted, I leave folks to the ones they think so highly of.”

Word Porn

It’s 2:00 in the morning, I have gone over and over in my head what I’ve done wrong. I asked myself over and over could I have done more? The answer is simple and that’s no, but that answer you as a good person can’t understand. Why did they stop talking to you? What did you do?

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve asked myself these questions in the last few weeks. At the start of the month, I texted a friend asking why I didn’t see them much anymore and it came back with “the phone works both ways!” So I started replaying in my mind what I might have done or how I dropped the ball. I looked back in messages showing month after month asking them to do something.

I attempt each month to have dinner or something with each of the friends. Taking the first step in asking them to do something, so I took a step back and I watched. Week after week they didn’t text and couldn’t find any reason or day to hang out. I watched them play golf, go out for drinks or hand out with other people but I watched and I was not one.

Then I realized I was putting more towards a friendship that didn’t seem to be there for them. I realized this was a one-way friendship, it took me weeks to convince myself this was true because as much as I didn’t want to admit it I was telling myself a lie.

Friendships work both ways, both people need to put forth the same amount of time and effort. The sad thing is once the person that thought the friendship was special realizes that it wasn’t a friendship that person has gotten the best part of them. They feel taken advantage of, hurt and like a complete fool.

If one thing I realized these last few months it’s this. Good people will nine times out of ten be played, they will be taken advantage of, and they will blame themselves. They will blame themselves for not putting in enough effort when they have. Not putting in enough time when they have. Not trying hard enough to make it work when they have.

Don’t blame yourself when you know you’ve done enough. Hold your head high, hold yourself straight and move on. Smile and keep walking because someone else will eventually take that friends place and treat you better than they treated you. Let them go.